Guess where I am :D ... the library. Go figure right? -_-
So I missed my art class this morning cause of the fact that I fell asleep at 2 this morning and needed the extra hour to sleep. But I woke up at 6 anyways because even though I told my dad that he shouldn't wake me up at the usual time, he still did.. which was kind of aggravating. Anywho, so I missed my art class and I have an hour to kill here before choir.. and then I am probably going to come back here and write another post or continue this one cause afterwards, I am going to have like, 3 hours to kill before the bus comes... I should probably be doing my english essay.. but it's already done minus the introduction and conclusion.. which happen to be the most difficult parts for me, but it's whatever. I can do it in a snap if it comes to me (which I hope it does.. it generally does). So I should tell the whole world about my weekend (even though only one person is "watching"). Actually.. I will start on Thursday cause that's when the majority of the drama happened. So all throughout the day I was feeling miserable because the boy I am hooked on kept making me feel like the best and only girl in the world.. but that's not what was making me feel bad. It's cause I kept remembering that I wasn't the only person.. or rather, girl. So I pretty much shut myself down and acted like a cold hearted bitch for a good 5 or so hours from the end of my jazz appreciation class until the end of English. Half way through the day, I had a break down. I couldn't hold it all in anymore. I completely shattered.. we were walking down to pick up his car from his grandparent's house and by the time we drove into the parking garage of the school I was almost shaking from feeling so horrible. It hurt so much on the inside. We parked, and he asked me if there was anything that I would like to say to him, since he noticed that while we were in our philosophy class I was writing something (that something being my feelings about the situation and how "I've been patient for five freaking months" and so on and so forth.. bitching out his monster of a "girlfriend" etc etc) I was writing this backwards so he couldn't read it if he tried. But it didn't stop him from noticing that I was venting out my feelings on paper.. I asked him if he remembered what he said about his pet peeve of people who are reluctant to or don't know how to adapt to new situations, he said yes, and then I started to cry as I said.. "Well, you are kind of a hypocrite.." got out of the car and walked to the other side of the garage where I sat in a corner and sobbed. I hate calling people out on things like that.. and it hurt a lot to just say that line. Luckily this happened between the gap in our classes and I had an hour and a half to let it all out. But man was it painful.. I never want to feel that way ever again.. So we went to our english class and he said that he never wants to see me cry like that ever again and asks for the wristband back. I still don't know what it means other than he has apparently made a decision. He's failed to tell me who he's chosen. (MENTAL NOTE: half hour till choir).. [Ew.. the person who just walked by smelled like rotten food and B.O. x| which was frankly, quite disgusting] Anyways, so he has gestured that he's made a decision, but hasn't told me his choice yet. He said that he didn't expect things to happen this way and that he wants time to plan things out. Mentally, I thought to myself "Well hell, boy I've given you five facking months to figure and plan things out. Don't you dare say that you need more time." And so I walked him to his math class and caught the bus home. I slept in on Friday morning (much needed.. got 14 hours of sleep), got up at about 1:30 in the afternoon browsed the web for a half hour or so, and then my cousin came home from his first day at Zep Solar as someone who assembles parts and we hung out for an hour, relaxed a bit and then picked up my brother so we could all drive up to Folsom where we went to the opening of the Jazz Festival there. Holy goodness were the bands and choirs that performed amazing. Then on Saturday we all went to the competition portion. I sat and listened to at least 11.5 hours of jazz. It doesn't sound tough, but it was exhausting. Almost 12 hours of music in one day is kinda crazy.. especially if you're with an annoying aunt who treats you like you are 10 years old. Facking embarrassing too. So saturday was all about the jazz competitions. Then on sunday I met up with my parents again, we went to an awesome asian market, then went out to sushi (Oh eM Gee.. so delicious 0.0). Then drove home in our new van. It's pretty rad. Anywho, I better run.. I have class.. but I'll be back. =]
peace, love and all that jazzz <3
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